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Wednesday, 17 November 2010

Let me get my hands on your mammary glands

The title is not something I have ever said to a woman.

I was at a course today in Copenhagen and wore my running clothing (which is always met with complete amazement by the other students) so I could run over lunch around "The Lakes". For those who don't live in Denmark, these are lakes in the center of the city right next to Rigshospital, where I spent my day. I had planned a 9 mile tempo run. I knew I would make it back late to the course (on diabetes, by the way), but who cares? It was also a habit of mine in med school to come to half of the classes. One needs time to run, right?

Anyway, warm up and then I began the tempo, feeling okay. Then, after a mile, I was all-out racing with a guy. Perhaps he was wondering why I was wearing a skin-tight green turtleneck while running (I also had to look somewhat normal at the course -wait... is a skin-tight green tutleneck normal under any circumstances? One of those items of clothing I have had for so long that I no longer question it's appropriateness). I don't know why he was less than 1 foot behind me for 2 miles, but he was. We were going at a nice 6:30 min per mile pace. After 2 miles of that, he gave up. And then, as I continued running, he yelled: "let me get my hands on your mammary glands!" Okay, so he didn't actually say that. This is Denmark, people. I just wanted to call the blog post that.

I continued, feeling okay, but about a half a mile later, I was overwhelmed with nausea. Everything inside of my body except my brain said - stop running fast! Or maybe it was ONLY my brain? The thing is, I am scared of messing something up if I am pregnant, so now if I get the slightest sense of "this does not feel right" I give up. But the whole point of intervals is they are supposed to, at least partially, not feel right, right? They are supposed to be hard. So, I will not be getting faster any time soon. I don't know what else to say. Is it a failure if I don't? Honestly, I don't think anyone reading this blog would think I was a failure if I took it easier on my hard runs for a little while.

Even SR suggested I not run the Rudersdal marathon on Sunday (and that's when I decided to switch to the 4:30 group). And when he mentioned to his dad that I did (and that I felt nauseated) there was great unrest in the family (ie. they think I am bat shit crazy). There is no evidence that hard training is bad when one is trying to get pregnant, or pregnant for that matter, but women and families everywhere will go on believing it nonetheless.

Thanks, Morrissey, for the title.

9 comments:

Glaven Q. Heisenberg said...

... as I continued running, he yelled: "let me get my hands on your mammary glands!" Okay, so he didn't actually say that. This is Denmark, people. I just wanted to call the blog post that.

Yeah, I knew right away you were lying, sister, because I figure the Scandinavian equivalent for this is something along the lines of, "Thank you, Ingrid Rønningsdøttir, for confirming my pre-existing suspicion that all worldly pursuits are vain and ultimately doomed to utter failure. Therefore let us perform together a vaguely inappropriate act of fetishistic sexual expression, even though it, too, is essentially meaningless and will at best only temporarily relieve our existential angst."

= Danish for: "Woo-hoo! Titties!1!"

I don't think anyone reading this blog would think I was a failure if I took it easier on my hard runs for a little while.

Hey! HEY!1! Don't tell ME what I think of you, you FAILURE! (Full Disclosure: I don't think you're a failure for the reasons YOU cite. If that's any comfort.)

Hahahahahaha! I'm just f*cking with you, sister!

But seriously: Nice mammaries.

SteveQ said...

I expect G.'s is only the first of many comments you may want to delete, but that's what you get with that title.

"The title is not something I have ever said to a woman." The other possibilities are worse. Have you said it to a man? A cow?

PiccolaPineCone said...

ok much as I hate commenting after Glaven (makes me feel like such a solemn geek) here is my suggested course of action. CD 1 - just before ovulation, train as per usual, perhaps slightly harder than usual to compensate for ... ovulation - start of menstruation, continue your training regime but but do "sham work-outs" i.e. you still change the pace, do intervals, do tempos whatever but slow them way, way down. So, for example, I do my 5 X 1 km repeat work-out 20 seconds slower per km so my body still has the sensation of pace changing and mentally it feels a bit like a work-out but the toll on the body is far less.
That being said, I think fertility is probably unaffected by work-outs (except for near implanatation) but personally it stresses me out to work-out after ovulation and stress definitely has an impact on fertility and implantation (Everybody and their cousin, Since the beginning of time) - (in case it wasn't clear that was meant to mimic a scientific scientation, as in: Smith et al, 1997). Anyhooo that's what gives me peace of mind.
But perhaps this is all a moot point??? Have you peed on a $1 canadian stick yet???

Fast Bastard said...

The family living under our thin floor/their thin ceiling may have heard this:

"WHERE ARE THE PREGNANCY TESTS?!?"
(screaming like a female, hormonal Owen Meany)

"What?"

"WHERE ARE THE GODDAMN PREGNANCY TESTS IN THE BRWON ENVELOPE FROM PICCOLAPINECONE?!? THEY WERE RIGHT HERE ON THE TABLE!!!"

"In that pile of your stuff? Didn't I put 'em in the bathroom cupboard?"

"NO I LOOKED ALL OVER THE HOUSE 8 TIMES WHEN YOU WERE OUT AND I CAN'T FIND THEM!!! I NEED ONE RIGHT NOW. RIGHT NOW!!! INEEDONERIGHTNOW"

Thankfully, they were in the cupboard.

cherelli said...

Ha! You guys made my day - first with the blog title, then the comments, outstanding. I like Piccola's ideas on when to push it the most. Also, if you're trying to get pregnant now, you will only get slower for 10mths??? So wouldn't maintaining speed and conditioning be a better priority anyway? Sometimes it's worth listening to that little voice. fast Bastard is hilarious...though he didn't tell us the result of you finding the pee sticks :)

sea legs girl said...

I am so grateful for the solemn and nonsolemn geeks who read this blog.

Just to set the record straight:i did run around screaming like that about a week ago, just because I wanted the sticks to be ready if/when I did need them. And they are in a white envelope. But then I took one yesterday- approximately 5 days before expected period and it was, of course, negative. I probably shouldn't expect $1 Canadian pregnancy tests to be the early-detection kind... maybe $1 American ones would be ;).

SteveQ said...

Those sticks take all the seriousness out of it. Two generations ago, a rabbit had to die for a pregnancy test; that'd keep the number of unneeded tests down!

PiccolaPineCone said...

don't be defaming canadian pee sticks girl! those stick, like most canadians, are extremely sensitive - 25 uL if I recall.
when i was knocked up with la cocotte i got the faintest positive (practically needed a microscope to see it) at 10 DPO or 3 days before expected period. 5 days before seems way early.

mmmonyka said...

To SLG, PPC: You guys are crazy!
(btw, I can't believe I spent 11Euros on one freaking test stick! Twice! Obviously, I am not experienced enough in these matters)

Why don't you just buy a set of 100 pregnancy strips for $43? That way you get each one for 43cents! $1 (both Canadian and American) seems such a waste of money...

And if you don't want to spend $43 at once, they also have set of 10 for 65cents each:)