Photo from Mount Royal, Frisco, Colorado.

"Children are fascinated by the ordinary and can spend timeless moments watching sunlight play with dust. Their restlessness they learn from you. It is you who are thinking of there when you are here. It is you who thinks of then instead of now. Stop. Let your children become the teachers and you the student" - William Martin

Friday, 25 July 2008

The unknown future of the kids...

The uncertainty is getting to be a bit overwhelming.

Let me start with the simplest issue, which is The Bois. We found out this morning that SR and I (for sure) need to go to court in mid-August to get SR listed as the father on Christian's (The Bois') birth certificate. We're really nervous about this, because if it doesn't happen, The Bois won't become a Dane and can't get social support or any of the benefits that Danes get in Denmark.

Next is the issue of step-daughter and step-son. Basically every other day, my impression of what is going to happen changes. Some days it sounds like step-daughter will be living with us in Denmark, some days it sounds like she might move to Denmark eventually, other days it sounds like she's not moving with us at all. Obviously this is hard on her. How can a 7 year old be expected to chose between parents? We are already looking for a house in Denmark and it's a bit crazy that we don't know who will be living there.

Obviously I've become very close to the kids. But I don't know what, if any, my role is in this decision. I just know that the indecision stresses everyone out (except maybe The Bois, who is just his meek and mild self). I feel particularly bad for SR for obvious reasons.
In the meantime, we'll run, work, play with the kids, watch The Tour de France and pretend there's nothing lurking under the surface. This is, after all, a wonderful time in our lives.

Running song of the Day: Publish My Love by Rogue Wave

3 comments:

Danni said...

I wouldn't stress about going to court. It's just hoops to jump through. And you're jumping through them. It will be fine.

As for the step-kids, that's rough but they will adapt to whatever arranagement they end up in. Either that or you will need to start saving for therapy. :p

Abbie said...

How come SR wasn't listed as the Bois' father when he was born?

sea legs girl said...

Yeah, good question abbie. My divorce still wasn't final when The Bois was conceived. If you are married when a child is conceived, the husband goes on the birth certificate. The only way to reverse this is in court. I don't see any reason SR won't be listed as the father, it just makes me nervous.
Danni, you're absolutely right about kids adapting. I just hope the adults can adapt, too.